We’ve all reflected on the confused, pimple-ridden teen we once were that was overly anxious about things that simply didn’t matter too much later in life and would eventually work themselves out. We worried about being popular, receiving invites to crowds we wanted to be a part of, being adored by our peers, and catching the eye of a boy we were awestruck from but who’s values we knew nothing about. All of these things seem trivial now and way below our maturity levels. We consumed ourselves in ‘keeping up with the jones” on frivolous, materialistic and socially acceptable things.
Now when we look back at our life, those concerns we had seem minuscule. Those friends we wanted wouldn’t have benefited us in the long run. That guy whose attention we wanted wouldn’t have given us the love we were searching for, because instead, we needed to learn to love ourself.
Now we have friends that benefit our experiences and self understanding. And we have learned our value and accept the person we have become. As we grow and evolve into different points in our life, reality changes, goals manifest and love presents itself in many forms. But do we really change from our confused and overly anxious selves? Later in life we will again reflect back on our less pimple-ridden faces now and probably think to ourselves “some of the things I stressed about didn’t really matter than much and all eventually worked itself out”. As much as we need to focus on the present, we also need to be the person we needed when we were younger, and experiencing the all-encompassing stressors of that point in our life. If we were to talk to teenage us, we would probably say: “Don’t join that crowd, those people wont accept you for you”. “Don’t worry about that guy, he’s already reached his peak in High School and wont be able to keep up with you in the future”. “Relax about the drama that surrounds you and pressures you into categories. Do what you want to do”
Wouldn’t it be great to have this perspective on our current life? Somebody to tell us: “Just because you are in your early twenties and don’t have a corporate job, doesn’t mean you are a nobody”. “That older guy you are heart broken about doesn’t really know what he wants and is getting in the way of your goals”. “This broke rut you’re in wont last forever and will actually grow you into a stronger, more driven person”.
At all points in our lives, our older selves would say “just step back and relax”. So why don’t we step back and look in the mirror right now on the pressures we are putting ourselves under and the concerns that are seemingly important, might not matter too much over all. We need to live a life that is enjoyable and true to ourselves, even if we don’t totally know who that is yet. Think about how unhappy you may have been at times in High School because you were worrying about all these things that don’t matter at all now. We need to do the same thing with our current age and be who we needed when we were younger.